Drama Queen, Princess, Whore

XBrood Live: Drama Queen, Princess, Whore

Thursday, July 06, 2006

Once upon a time there were three friends...Yeah, I'm sure you thought I was going to start telling a little bed time story, 'course with a title like that I don't know how you'd get that impression. I'm sitting at work studying my ass off and suddenly a thought came to mind. I have no friends. I mean sure I talk to my girlfriends on occasion, but mostly I hang out with my ex-husband and his girlfriend. I have no friends. I used to. Sure did.

I used to have three very good friends....Okay so four. One works with me at my office now, but I can't really say I have anything in common with her. She still likes to go out to clubs and party. I was over that when I was 23. Not to mention the fact that she's just plum annoying. That's right...I said plum. Another girlfriend recently moved to Washington. I talked to her once since she left. She was in my wedding last year and helped with a few of the flower decorations. She was so awesome. I haven't had the chance to send her some pictures of her family yet. I feel terribly guilty about that, but I'll relieve my guilt soon... I hope. *gulp*

You always have a couple of friends that you spend as much free time with as you can though, don't you. Friends that you've perhaps had most of your life and didn't think you could ever live without. I used to game with my friends. I mean we gamed hard. I'm talking all nighters...all weekenders...all week....errrr....s...seses. Towards the end one of our favorite pastimes became getting drunk in front of the TV while playing halo against our, boyfriends or husbands. Those were the days. Everyone has them you know...those days.

The days where everything is perfect and nothing could go wrong. You have friends, a loving family, not a lot of money, not a lot of bills and booze. Loads and loads of booze. Things seemed simpler back then until someones past caught up to them that is. No, no one hacked anyone's penis off. Nothing quite that dramatic. You see one of my friends was a bit on the promiscuous side. Oh sure, I had the open marriage. I had sex with people other than my husband on occasion. In fact I had sex with her...a few times. I even had two girlfriends during the time I was still married (it's a long story), but could seriously and quite honestly count my partners on one hand...plus two fingers. It was unfortunate that one of those partners was her boyfriend of 5 years. *shock and awe* Yeah, I'm a whore. No wait....I'm the Drama Queen. I'll get to that in a minute.

They hadn't been together for more than 6 months before her boyfriend started to hit on me. I was very firm with him. In fact I was firm with him for four and a half years as I watched my friend cheat on her boyfriend repeatedly for the next five. One man after another and it wasn't until after I'd done the horrible deed (more than once and it wasn't that horrible) that I found out she had also been with his best friend. My indiscretion all came out in the end of course, he finally caught her cheating with the Princess' boyfriends long time friend and somehow she got him to confess the truth. I think it was something like that. I can't remember. Whatever the case may be I was in the shit and I deserved it. We felt such a loss. We knew we'd never be the same. It was very strange, but she held me the entire time I confirmed everything that happened. You know me, I don't leave out the details.

What was even stranger is that I had been with both of them less than a week apart behind one another's backs....I'm a strange person and I'm sure my husbands going to be furious with me. He doesn't like other people to know how terribly naughty I am...was. We stopped talking to each other she and I. The Princess, though, was due to be married and because she wouldn't give up my friendship we all stayed fast friends. I spent the next few years being the best friend I could be and we did everything together. She spent the next few years telling everyone what I did to her and I let her. You guys know about my guilt issues right? Yeah. I let her tell family, new friends and even her fiance's family what a whore I was because I slept with her boyfriend of 5 years. Oh, but were such good friends you see. She would never dream of losing me because of something so trivial. She was perfect. She was shiny. She was....spotless and everyone loved her. Her new boyfriends family I mean. I have to be honest. We loved him too. He and his family were fantastic. Despite the things she told them about me they accepted our friendship and me into their lives. We had such good times with them. Our little family grew because of her boyfriend.

I think she was with him for about 2 years before she broke his heart over a pile of dirty laundry in her garage while he snoozed away in their bed. We were shocked, we thought that was all behind us. Lies, secrecy and deceit were no longer a thing of the past and both I, the Drama Queen, and the Ice Princess were sucked into it all over again. We didn't like it. Not one little bit. We tried to deal with it as her friend, but never really told her exactly how we felt. I mean there was no way I could throw in my two cents without feeling the backlash of my past and Princess...well, she caught the brunt of everything and was pretty much left to fend for herself.

Princess was used, abused and totally taken advantage of and she couldn't find it in her heart to injure and maim the fiance. It was awful to watch, but I stood back in the wake of it all. One day I was sitting alone with the offender...the dirty laundry sex fiend and she asked me a very strange question. She asked me what she was. What her "secret" nickname was. She said that I was of course the "Drama Queen", which she actually dubbed me and everyone else refuted. That the little one was the Ice Princess. (something like that) My husband and I used to call her a Princess because she took so long to do her makeup and because she's just so mousy cute you just want to die when you look at her. So I was the Drama Queen, Princess was the IceMaiden Princess because she's a bitch and never cries....what was she she wondered.

I think I would have pissed my pants laughing If she only knew what everyone called her. I know she's got to have known. I mean no one can truly be that stupid can they? What was funny was that she actually said, "I know what I did was a little slutty, but..." A little? How can I possibly emphasis how truly Little that wasn't? It had been years since all of that stuff happened between us. When she got together with her fiance we thought her life would change for the better, we had high hopes for her and he was a really good man. Her ex deserved to lose her and she deserved to lose him. She had never been faithful; for her own idiotic reasons of course, everyone has reasons right? Her fiance had never given her any reason to doubt her relationship and even if he wasn't paying attention to her the way she wanted him to he didn't deserve that.

What did everyone call her behind her back? Whore. Her friends had been calling her a whore behind her back for many many years. MANY years. In fact it was much longer than I had been dubbed "The Drama Queen" by her. Does this give me some sort of satisfaction? No, not really because I do believe that I'm a bit more than dramatic. I'm all of those things; Drama Queen, Princess & Whore.

She's got cancer now. If I heard correctly, she's got cervical cancer and they may have to remove her cervix. Do I believe in Karma? No, I think it's one big horrible coincidence that things have gone that way for her. Despite it all I feel guilt for not being her friend anymore after all.... we women....we're all those things.

Posted by Maharet at 2:30 PM