Thursday, November 1, 2007

It Feels Like Giving Birth To A Cow

Ever had a baby cow just plop right out of your hole? Any old hole will do. That's what it felt like as I waited for my score to pop up. It felt like my entire world was about to come apart. I waited for the words YOU FAILED to flash in front of my face. After 7 hrs of torture I was ready to walk out with my head hung low, tail between my legs and hopes for the future dashed. BUT I FUCKING PASSED BITCHES!!!!!!! I fucking passed with a 77%. My own compliance/operations manager got a 77%, INSANE.

I'm annoyed with myself because had I stuck to my routine these last two months and just plowed through everything the right way my score would have easily been above 80%. Now that I would have been jumping for joy over, but 77% is WAY more than decent enough. The national passing average score is 73% so I'm fucking overjoyed...not ecstatic, just overjoyed. Really, I just don't know what to do with myself.

I mean, nothing has changed. It's only been one day, but I don't feel different. I still feel like there's something I'm not doing that I should be. When we were watching The Condemned last night I kept getting up off the couch and when I realized I had nothing to study for just plopped back down and smoked a cigarette. Now my excuse is going to be smoking because I have nothing to do.

My head is swirling with all the compliments and sincere congratulations. I think my friends and co-workers are more excited about this than I am. Already people are telling me I have to shake my boss down for more money... lol, maybe later....maybe later a lot sooner than I think. lol

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