Monday, November 30, 2009

I'm A Bit Fucking Miffed


Angry Face
Originally uploaded by Piez
Actually, now that I think about it I'm really pissed. He didn't really give me a present did he? He bought dinner, but (and this is funny) when I asked him what he was getting he said, "The cheapest thing on the menu." So, I decided to be moderate when I ordered and requested a $25 plate. When it came time to order he instead requested the most expensive plate at $39. Um...We've never actually spent more than $25 - $30 on a plate and when he thought I was paying for dinner (which I truly was) he decided to get the most expensive one. I can't say I didn't think about it at the time, but I didn't want to ruin dinner or the evening.

After having written that last ridiculous post I’ve begun to remember the times that I did mention his lack of gift giving ability. I don’t expect anyone to read my mind. I don’t expect you to guess about my likes and dislikes. Hell, I don’t even expect you to surprise me. It’s the fact that he doesn’t bother trying. I mean he’s not fucking trying at all.

He’s never bought me a nice gift. He’s never given me anything thoughtful at all.

I’m fucking sorry. I’M SO FUCKING SORRY, but you tell me how thoughtful this is.

Our First Anniversary was paper. He gave me two paper cranes made out of…Not special paper, not origami paper, HELL it wasn’t even wrapping paper. Just plain ordinary paper the kind you shove into your copy machine every day. I asked for origami turtle doves or a Japanese lantern…he asked so I told him what I thought would be nice because I knew that a photograph album would be too difficult for him to put together.

Our Second Anniversary was cotton. I can’t remember what he gave me. Probably a card.

Our Third Anniversary was leather. He gave me an “antique” leather belt that had a lot of significance and meaning to him. Really? So much significance it always ended up on the bottom of our closet? How interesting.

This Fourth Anniversary was flowers or fruit. He paid for the dinner I took him to because I left my wallet in the car. He said we would go somewhere “nice” over the weekend for his gift. Drive down the coast and land in a diner somewhere a long the way. Of course, it was our friends birthday and on Sundays I’m not too keen on getting “lost” in the hills looking for a place to eat. Ohh, that’s nice isn’t it? He’s being thoughtful isn’t he? At least he’s trying right?

Trying what? To do what I did and take me to a random restaurant? He didn’t even appreciate my gift. Sure it was a joke, but it was totally random, thoughtful and fell in line with the gift idea he had in mind which was a literal translation of the suggested gift of the year. I didn’t even get that. He didn’t even pick a flower off the street.

I’m angry. I’m really, really angry. How can he make this up to me?

He can’t. He’s only a man.

7 comments:

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