Monday, August 4, 2008

Tangents Rock! (birth of the spiral jerk)

okay, i was going to brave the telephone system once again, but i'm a little afraid of it at this point so here's my reaction to your message @brettbum.

BRETT: lol back @Maharet That was pretty good for me, and I wouldn't dream of letting my kids listen to you when you are cocking your leg to kick someone in the balls verbally.

MAHA: hahaha...

BRETT: I would also point out to @gtowna if we had had a ratings system on Utterz, I don't think this 67 chain of replies to your topic would have taken place.

MAHA: hahahhahahahahaha.... true.

BRETT:We all get to hear it, see it, read it, feel it, roll it on our tongues taste it and spit it out, if it bites us back.


*gulp* i don't know why that made me laugh so hard...just sort of did. could have been the monster. i'm feeling a little hippy dippy.

see, this is what happened to me on my way to the store. i couldn't stop BITCHING about this whole discussion. it seems to have infiltrated every single synapse in my brain and i couldn't stop feeling so obsessed about it. in fact, my husband and i discussed it on our way out of the house, on our way to the car, driving down the street in the car to the store...half way there, just before the bridge over our river bed i poured face powder all over myself.

when i say all over i mean my chest, seat belt, entire left leg, part of the right, the seat, my purse, wallet and car door. i just sat there. unfeeling and unmoving. all i could think was, 'damn you adam....DAMN YOU ADAM DANIEL MEZEI FROM PRAGUE!' so i did a video. as my husband laughed his ass off at me, i made a clip to further humiliate myself and blamed the entire thing on adam from prague while letting him know that despite this silly and very long discussion on the subject i would STILL very much look forward to future posts. but alas, my video was too long and i'll have to edit it to send.

on my way out of the grocery store i also dropped my mega monster. it fell from the top of my car and fizzled nearly 1/4 of it's nummylicious sweet and fizzy and taurine-ated contents OUT onto the hot and dirty asphalt. you see, while i'm not on my medication my monster is like my crack. i must have it. rigid has shown me the way. i must have it or else everyone else around me will have to die. for a split second...okay, more than a split second i considered getting down on my hands and knees to slurp the now sweltering hot liquid off the dirty and oily floor, but thankfully only resorted to slurping the last few drops off the side of the container. when i caught myself doing so i stopped and quickly jumped back into the car once again cursing the name ADAM DANIEL MEZEI FROM PRAGUE.

what is it about this man? i think he reminds me a little of my husband. he loved to irritate me on purpose. loved to get me all "hot under the collar" and then laugh at me. i used to yell at him and tell him to piss off. correct him furiously when i thought he was wrong and i couldn't shut up. the more i bitched at him the more he loved me, the more i hated him for making me angry the more in love i became as well. i'm not saying i'm in love with you danny...i'm just saying... you get to me.

i think i just felt a pitter in my patter. LMAO! holy...okay minster, you're getting put away for tomorrow now. MINSTER!!!!!!!



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